


I'm Sorry

by mggislife2789



Category: Criminal Minds, Spencer Reid - Fandom
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-24
Updated: 2017-02-24
Packaged: 2018-09-26 13:42:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9900470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mggislife2789/pseuds/mggislife2789
Summary: Inspired by the song Somebody Else by The 1975.Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters or their original stories. This is only for fun. It's where my brain goes after the credits roll. No copyright intended. Better safe than sorry. ;)





	

Home.

Normally, it was the place he couldn’t wait to go back to, but tonight, it was the place he least wanted to go. 

Going home meant seeing Y/N, and seeing Y/N meant dealing with the possibility that their relationship wasn’t what it used to be. They’d drifted apart - yet he didn’t want this to end. She’d been a constant source of happiness in his life for the past four years. She’d been there for him when no one else was; the thought of her with someone else made his heart hurt. Yet he knew that they’d been drifting.

Home.

Despite his best efforts to think of anything that might keep him out of the apartment and away from this conversation, he returned home to see Y/N sitting on the couch. 

She was sitting on the couch reading a book when he walked in - still as beautiful as ever. Why had they drifted? “Hi, Spence,” she said before looking back down toward her book. He could tell by her darting eyes that the book was used as a cover; she didn’t want to be having this conversation either, but it needed to happen.

“Y/N, can I ask you something?” he wondered, walking towards the couch as the tears already began to form behind her eyes. “I need you to be honest with me.”

Silently, she told him to continue. She knew what was coming and he knew what he needed to say, but saying it was harder than he thought. He had to swallow the lump in his throat quite a few times before he was able to utter those words. “Is there somebody else?”

“I haven’t cheated,” she said, “but I have been talking with someone. Someone who is here. Present for me, you know?”

Spencer’s lip quivered as he wondered whether this job at the Bureau was more of a burden than a blessing at this point. He was constantly away. When he was actually home, he was too tired, so he understood what she meant by present. But hearing her say that she had emotionally connected with someone else, in a way that, although she didn’t explicitly state, she could also connect with on a physical level - that broke him.

Her lip quivered as the damn holding back her tears broke, flooding her face with the salty liquid. “I’m sorry, Spence,” she wept. “I don’t know what happened to us. I don’t know what went wrong, but I feel like we’re not who we were when we met. Or we’ve drifted. Or something else. I don’t know. This isn’t what I wanted.”

“Me either,” he cracked. “So for the past few weeks, when you’ve had your head in your phone?”

“Sometimes it’s him,” she admitted, adding quickly, “but I swear I haven’t slept with him or done anything. We only talk.”

That should’ve made him feel better. In a way it did, but in another way it only made this hurt more. In their four years together, they had broken up and gotten back together twice, but this time, the third time, this was the first when there was anyone else involved. The past two times they’d broken up, she’d come back to him fairly quickly, saying that they were made for each other. Each time, his heart had ached at her absence, so letting her back in made him more vulnerable. 

“If we break up again, I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep letting you go and barely getting past it only to have you come back to me telling me that we were meant to be,” he cried. “It hurts to much and I can’t do it again.”

Y/N brought her hand to her mouth with a loud clap as a sob wrenched its way out of her throat. “I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to give up on us,” she said, “but we keep passing each other like ships in the night and that’s no way to live with anyone, no less carry on a successful relationship.”

“I know,” he whispered, a tear falling past his lip and onto the material of his jacket. “I’m sorry.”

Never had two words said so much more than intended. I’m sorry didn’t just mean he was sorry that his job kept him away from home. It meant this relationship was over. It meant this relationship that he’d been in for four years wasn’t meant to be after all. It meant that she would get up and leave his apartment and from now on, his life would be different. I’m sorry meant they wished things didn’t have to be as they were. Two words said so much more.

“I’m sorry, too. What do we do now?” she asked.

Without waiting for an answer, she got up and went to their bedroom, returning with a duffel bag of clothes and things to presumably take to her parents’ house. “Take as much time as you need to transfer your things,” he muttered, picking at his nails as he tried to figure out what the hell went wrong. He sounded like a bank talking to a client about transferring money, not a distraught boyfriend breaking up with who he once thought of as the love of his life.

“I’ll try and make sure to come get things when you aren’t home,” she said softly. “I don’t want to make this harder than it is.”

He didn’t want to imagine what harder might feel like. “Could it be any harder?”

“I don’t think so,” she replied, pulling her duffel bag over her shoulder and heading toward the door. “I’m so unbelievably sorry, Spencer.”

“Me too,” he mumbled as she closed the door. “More than you’ll ever know.”


End file.
